I’ve always been a sissy when it comes to girls. This goes all the way back to high school when I had this huge and serious crush on a beautiful girl. She was an attractive celebrity look-alike schoolmate brimming with self-confidence while I was an awkward and bumbling teenager burdened with a physical disability.
For obvious reasons, I couldn’t afford to simply walk up to her and tell her how I feel. I had to be contented watching her from afar and secretly hoping that she could be mine, even for just a brief moment. That’s when I came upon this song by Paul McCrane.
Is it okay if I call you mine?
Just for a time
And I will be just fine
The song became a personal favorite since then. It served as my refuge, especialy on lonely nights when I would stare out the window and wonder where she was, wishing she was beside me to take away my loneliness.
If I ask of you is it all right
If I ask you to hold me tight
Through a cold dark night
Cause there may be a cloudy day in sight
On other days, I would just think of her smile and wonder if she’s doing ok. If I see her in school or in church, I’d watch her from a safe distance and wait for a quick glance or a grin that she might throw my way. How my heart would jump with joy if one of her friends calls out her name.
Like when I hear your name
Or see a place that you’ve been
Or see a picture of your grin
So what happened to this girl? She eventually moved to a different home and started working soon after graduating from college. I never got to see her again. Every once in a while, though, she crosses my mind and I would smile and reminisce.
And what I’m trying to say isn’t really new
It’s just the things that happen to me
When I’m reminded of you
Thinking about high school and that one special girl? Go back in time with Paul McCrane here:
AKA Music 